You are a beautiful child of God. Don't ever doubt that, and don't ever think or say that you aren't good enough. Don't ever let anyone tell you that you aren't beautiful or good enough. You are good enough because he made you good enough. You shouldn't ever have to have a male assure you that you're beautiful. We all make mistakes. We can ask God for forgiveness and move on with life without making them again. We just have to stick with it. You need a support group. The members here on Mypraize can do that to an extent, but I think you need actual people in your real life helping you. If you feel like there's no one out there, you're wrong. There is ALWAYS someone out there willing to help people such as yourself. It's human nature to sin. It's not an excuse, but we all do it. it's in our genes. No one is perfect. I may have more to say once I let all this sink in, but this is all I have for now. If you need to talk personally, feel free to send me a message. I'd be happy to chat with you - and that goes for anything. Not just this. I will be praying for you, and I hope things clear up in your life. Hold your head high, gorgeous. You can fix it all with the help of God.